The Last Thing the Internet Needs Now


Because Everybody Has to Be Good At *Something* (UPDATED 10.28.2008)

UPDATE: Gotta love these.

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Texas A&M fans don’t have much to cheer about football-wise this season, but you wouldn’t know it from these smack videos from AggieReport.com (via YouTube). Click the magick words for the Oklahoma State video.

Deadspin took notice on October 23:

Their football team may 2-5 and winless in their conference (and they haven’t even played Oklahoma or Texas yet), but the Texas A&M boosters behind AggieReport.com are winning at least one battle this season. Their smack-talking YouTube videos are a surreal little slice of internet joy.

Click to see the Kansas State, Iowa State, and Texas Tech videos.

The OSU video was posted in late September and seems the most disappointing compared to the KSU and ISU videos, which are hilarious. I would have thought by the start of this season people had finally decided the press-rage, screaming, angry Mike Gundy rant of a year ago had finally exhausted its usable comedy material, and this attempt to lurch out every last precious drop of it seems a little halfhearted. Either way, at least OSU — largely the redheaded stepchild in this state when it comes to college football — has a good team to cheer for if it gets everybody’s mind off the loss of untold millions of Boone Pickens money, necessitating the postponement of OSU’s grand plans for whatever they were going to do with it.

Actually, the unfortunate news about Pickens’ donation probably would have made for more smack gold if the overall real-life situation (i.e., the fact that we’re careening head-first without a helmet into a deep recession/potential depression) wasn’t so starkly bleak.

Texas A&M took their report card home to Mommy and so far she’s sticking this to the refrigerator with a cheesy magnet:

18-14 loss against Arkansas State
28-22 win at New Mexico
41-23 loss against Miami (FL)
21-17 win against Army
56-28 loss at Oklahoma State
44-30 loss against Kansas State
43-25 loss against Texas Tech

with games upcoming versus Iowa State (as of right now this game could be billed as the Big 12 Toilet Bowl), Colorado, Oklahoma, at Baylor and at Texas. It isn’t out of the realm of possibility that the Aggies could go winless in conference. I anticipate and dread a little what the clever kids have in store for the Buffs, Bears, Sooners and Longhorns in video form.



Ol’ What’s Her Name And the Ska Treatment
October 24, 2008, 12:50 pm
Filed under: YouTube nonsense | Tags: , , , ,

While in YouTube coma last weekend, fighting off a cold, I re-discovered this nearly 30 year old snotty, catchy chestnut in my favorites (I hardly ever go to YouTube — I was just bored and trying not to get sick and I had done all the crossword puzzles in the newspapers I had laying about) and, gosh darn it, I just can’t help but think about a certain Woman In the News.

If Sarah Palin had her way, millions of young women would be answering the musical question “ain’t you heard of contraception?” with blank faces and shrugging shoulders. To me that’s scary, but you know that because I’ve already written about it. But the madness goes on, with Sarah this and Sarah that and Sarah Wrap and Que Sarah, Sarah … if by some chance the Republican ticket gets elected (actually CNN is projecting Oklahoma to stay ruby red despite the pleas of the likes of Kurt Hochenauer), it’ll be a sick, sad triumph of red-meat fed reactionaries bent on starting Armageddon so they can get in the Meet ‘n’ Greet With Jesus Express Line, or at the very worst, turn some 40 years of progress with respect to race relations, gender relations, et cetera turned on its ear, and then I suppose having it lopped off like the dude in Reservoir Dogs. I don’t want to go backwards if I can help it, thanks. I’d also like to keep at least one of my ears because I need something to keep my glasses on.

If you watch any news channel or listen to NPR, you know all this crap and I’ll try not to belabor the tons of bricks that line the Bridge to Nowhere Insanity — the $150K shopping spree; the whole “real America” thing, and the generally ugly turn the campaign has taken.

Palin has — willingly or not — awakened something that’s been festering in the underbelly of the nation that is unwelcome. I admire that John McCain has asked people to be respectful of his opponent (and in general I admire and respect McCain for his naval service. That doesn’t change the fact I disagree with many of his policies and my vote’s going to Obama), but I’d be more inclined to believe him a little more if he’d take some duct tape and put it over Bible Spice’s sanctimonious, pandering piehole.

It’s been a fun ride I guess, this Campaign ’08, but now I’m sorta ready for it to be over and for those of us who should be the real “deciders” in this nation to just do it and move on and clean up all the shite. The idea of moving on will make me want to pogo the night away.

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By the way, weren’t The Specials just all kinds of freakin’ brilliant?

Once upon a time, bands wrote songs with thought-provoking statements — or at least angry ones — and couched them in solid musicianship and, well crap, you could dance to it. Every li’l slice of goodness I linked in that above sentence is well worth your time. We need bands like this today in the here and now, srsly.